The Plan
Surely, it is no longer a
surprise to some of us why we have a happy wedding but we do not have a happy
home and this kept on wondering where we got it all wrong.
In this manner, why is that
people make a superb wedding ceremony but ends up getting a divorce, while some
others also struggle in their marriages?
"Here are 11 ways to keep you marriage fresh" - According to huffpost
This is why we came up to
enlighten us on this topic we called Sad Marriage yet Happy wedding and where
we got it all wrong.
The Binding
Wedding is lovely because it
is ordained by God as a way of binding and bringing two people together to
become one. It is also awesome and wonderful when we see people gather to
celebrate us during this period, the joy we derive from this could be endless
and the memories could be everlasting as everything looks so promising.
Having said this, it has
always been so sad that most fruitful and promising wedding ends up in a sad
and frustrating marriages, this might be a reason of so many factors which we shall
discuss as we read on.
We should have wondered why
there are so many relationships that starts happily but ends up in a sad
marriage after a happy wedding.
People find themselves in marriages
that they do not bargained for, because they end up in homes that frustrate
their lives and if care is not taken, it could lead to their early graves.
Here, the question arises,
whose fault is it? Is it the fault of the man or the woman? Where exactly have
we got it all wrong? These are the questions that might come to our minds when
we fall victim or find ourselves in this kind of situation.
The crucial reason why we
find ourselves in the situation of having a happy wedding yet sad marriage, and
where we got it all wrong is what we are about to discuss now.
Better And Worse Time
As we have said earlier,
marriage is an institution ordained by God to bind two people together to
become one and to multiply. It is a thing which is said to be for better and
for worse.
Even if it is for the better
and for the worse it does not mean that it is a do or die affair. One thing we
should understand is that marriage is essential, it is a beautiful thing and good
memories to keep yet, marriage is not a do or die affair.
The
Rush:
One of the mistakes people often make is that they rush into relationships, and
this is why most relationships fail or end in break up due to the fact that
they could not endure for long.
Although, every relationship
has its own flows which is normal, because we humans are not perfect and so
does our relationships but then, we should also understand that there is
nothing like perfection in a relationship.
Marriage can never be
perfect but it could only be balanced. It takes good management to make things
work or balance.
Marriage is a life time
thing, and that is the more reason why we should never try to rush into it. It
is often clichéd that “when you rush
into a marriage you will eventually rush out” this is absolutely correct
because if we do, we end up losing all
at the end.
Handling
The Pressure: Pressure is another factor that causes a
relationship to end in sad memories or marriage. We should always understand
that pressure could make us take the wrong decisions in life, most especially
in marriages.
Some of this pressure could
be social, family and peer pressures.
There are so many friends who are fakers with bad influence; this is the more
reason why we should try to stay away from fake friends.
Also Read: Fake Friends And How They Mislead
Pressure should not be the
reason why we get into a relationship in the first place and it should not also
be the reason why we should end up in a sad home soon after a happy marriage.
It in any case must not also
be the reason why we should regret at the end. We must not allow anyone
whosoever to put pressures on us while we make relationship decisions.
Many of those people who
pressurize us to get marriage will not be there for us when we start to face the
consequences. At the end we face the consequence alone with regret.
Material
Things: So many people became a victim in dating the wrong
soulmates, after a beautiful, wonderful and a happy wedding, in the long run
they eventually end up in disaster.
These sets of people in most
times are into relationships not because they have true feelings for their
partners but because of the material things that they aimed to acquire from
their partners.
In relationships some people
are after the money while others are after the physique of the other partner,
such as beauty, the cuteness, shape and so on.
Most of these kinds of
relationships that end up in marriage are relationships that they did not
bargained for, it came at the unexpected time which they may not see it coming.
In some cases, some women
get pregnant in the process of their relationships, as to avoid shame and
embarrassment in haste, they decided to tie the knot with their partners and in
the end, ends up in the wrong home.
Also Read: The Slay Queen Who Just Repented
The Hip: This is another
reason why the rate of people having a happy wedding yet sad home keeps
multiplying. Hipping is a bad thing; we should not encourage it nor allow it to
affect us.
Hipping could misleads us
into taking actions that we do not wish to take, as people try to manipulate a
way to make us do something we do not wish to do. With that,
they form the attitude of hipping us.
Hipping is a way in which
people give us confidence and false hope that we most times regret while they
have nothing to lose. People hip us most times to mislead us.
They will tell us words like
“you can do it; did you not see how your
friend did it and it became a success? Why
are you so lazy, I know you have what it takes”.
Meanwhile, they know within
themselves that we are not capable of doing those things, they mislead us into
doing what we ought not to do and this apply mostly to romantic relationships,
where we choose the wrong partners and
at the end we are left with regrets.
Hipping is an act of
deceitfulness.
Brokenness:
Brokenness is another reason why people have a happy wedding but ends up in sad
marriages. Many people do not understand that marriage is not a thing to rush
into while wedding is also not to celebrate without a serious plan afterwards.
Many people will tell us “we
will support you for your wedding” but what about our marriage, do we need the
support of people? Actually this is one place most people got it all wrong.
People can help us plan or
contribute toward the success of our wedding but it is not reasonable and
advisable if people are the ones supervising our homes afterwards in marriage.
Some of us spend all we have
to give the wedding ceremony a blast, guests enjoy themselves, have fun but at
the end they leave us to go back to their respective homes. Then at this point,
we are all left with our problems.
Wedding is for days at most,
while marriage is for a life time, though, some people makes the mistake of
spending so much on a wedding that will only last for day.
At that point, they show off
with whatever resources they have while they forget that they need a better
plan for the future which is the marriage itself.
After spending so much on
the wedding, most people are left with little or no financial back up, then
they start running helter-skelter to find a way out as they become broke; here,
there is no way they could avoid having misunderstanding, as this leads to a
sad ending.
It is not advisable to get
married when our income does not meet up to twice or thrice of our expenditure.
We must be financially buoyant to stand up right before planning for marriage.
Do
not listen to the noise of the crowd, the pressure they give, people’s
impressions and opinion does not count on how we wish to spend the rest of our
lives.
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